Mr. Schlemiel wanted to retire in the country, and live on a chicken farm, but felt that he could never afford it.  It was his lifelong dream.  He vigilantly checked the Chicken Farm Real Estate Magazine, and the prices were always way above what Mr. Schlemiel could afford.

But, one day, he was approached by Mr. Schmegeggi, who had heard about Mr. Schlemiel’s dream to own a chicken farm, and he told Mr. Schlemiel that he had a chicken farm that was a tenth of the price of the average chicken farm.

Mr. Shlemiel could not believe his luck.  “I’ll take it!!” he exclaimed.

But, when Mr. Schlemiel got to the chicken farm, he immediately discovered that there were no chickens.

Being very upset over this, he called Mr. Schmegeggi to complain.

“There’s no chickens on the chicken farm!” Mr. Schlemiel cried.

Mr. Schmegeggi thought about this and said:

“You can’t count your chickens until they hatch.”

For a brief second, Mr. Schlemiel thought this made sense, and he screamed:

“But, there are no chickens to hatch because there are no chickens to lay eggs!!”

Mr. Schmegeggi thought about this and said:

“I thought you would say that so because I am such a nice guy, I went to the supermarket, and bought you two dozen eggs.”

Mr. Schlemeil was not pleased.  “I want chickens.  Not an omelette!!” Where are the chickens?

Mr. Schmegeggi pointed out the window and said:

“The chickens crossed the road to get to the other side.”

Mr. Schlemiel looked out the window and saw the other side with hundreds of chickens.  He noticed that the grass was greener on the other side.  So, Mr. Schlemiel complained:

“You never told me that the grass was greener on the other side!!!”

Mr. Schmegeggi quickly retorted:

“But, the grass is always greener on the other side!!”

Mr. Schlemiel was fuming.

“That’s a paltry excuse if I ever heard one!!”

Mr. Schmegeggi responded:

“Of course not.  It is a poultry excuse.”

As Mr. Schmegeggi continued to egg Mr. Schlemiel on, Mr. Schlemiel was in a very fowl mood indeed!!